Finding a natural deodorant that works and keeps your body free from toxins, irritants, chemicals is a roller coaster of emotion that usually ends in dismay. You’re forced to buy a ticket to get back on the ride. If you’ve struggled to source a non-toxic, organic deodorant that eliminates stank and doesn’t irritate your pits, it’s likely you’ve experienced the 5 stages of deodorant disappointment.
It’s not me, it’s you.
You board the crowded subway and grab a hand hold only to catch a whiff of garlicy-musk so strong it brings tears to your eyes. You think to yourself that this bout of body odor must be coming from someone else in the packed transit car. You bought this deodorant yesterday, after combing through countless reviews. Yeah, that scent totally belongs to someone else. We’re in a heat wave after all and these bozos probably didn’t do as much investigation into their pit products.
The WTF Stage.
You sit down to lunch with a friend at a cute outdoor patio and reach across the table for the pepper only to catch another pungent whiff. Hint: it’s not your salad niçoise. What the ever-loving hell is going on here, you think as you vigorously pepper your lunch. Why is this new deodorant not working? Should you dab at your ripe pits with the delicate linen napkin across your lap or rush to the bathroom to a quick PTA bath, minus the T and A?
Perhaps-ing your way to Pit Perfection.
On your walk back to your coworking space, your mind starts churning. Maybe you really do need to detox your pits for this natural deodorant to work. Perhaps you just need to wait a few weeks and keep using it, day in and day out for your body to grow accustomed to it. No other personal care products work like that though, do they? Perhaps if you just commit to reapplying it every few hours, you can stave off stink until some magical ingredient kicks in. You pick up another stick on the way back and reapply hurriedly in the drugstore bathroom.
You return home at the end of the day only to discover your cat doesn’t even want to nuzzle up against you. You sniff your pits and alas, the B.O. is back, baby, with a vengeance. You make a mug of hot tea, sink down on the couch, and begin to sulk. Bear hugs, conga lines, and high fives disappear in the rearview as you soldier on into a decidedly solitary future.
Like you, we’ve worked our way through the four stages many times, only to find that the fifth stage – buying another stick of deodorant in hopes of achieving healthy, fragrant pits – was not good enough for us. We decided that we were going to hop off this emotional rollercoaster entirely and make our own deodorant. One that is actually non-toxic. One that works. One that offers people the chance to try it without fear of throwing hard-earned money down the drain.
Enter stage left: Pit Liquor. Denatured vodka and whiskey kills the bacteria that live in your armpits. Within seconds, the light alcohol scent evaporates and leaves behind naturally scented essential oils, like lavender, pear, cedarwood, or rose. Teas, arrowroot, and salt make your armpit undesirable for new bacteria to grow, resulting in good smelling underarms all day long and no chemical regrets. Each body responds better to either the rum, vodka, or whiskey base and we are happy to help you find deodorant heaven.
It’s time to get off this ridiculous ride. You’ve got better things to do. Try Pit Liquor. If you don’t love it, your first one is on us.
Razor burn is the worst. It makes you feel uncomfortable, and often comes with an unsightly rash. It seems like one of those terrible but inevitable parts of shaving. But we're here to tell you it doesn't have to be.
Men have been making use of razor burn solutions for decades, using after-shave balms that are mostly alcohol, a known bacteria-killer. But women? We are way behind the curve. Pit Liquor aims to change that.
How exactly does razor burn happen? Glad you asked.
You shave your face, pits, legs, or, you know, other areas. While you're just there to shave, your razor indiscriminately opens hair follicles in addition to getting rid of those pesky hairs. The razor itself brings bacteria into those now-open follicles, injecting bacteria into any open area because your razor has old hair, skin cells, and general bathroom germs trapped within its blades. The bacteria goes all the way into the base of the hair follicle because the hair protecting this is now gone. Then the bacteria has a big ole party reproducing until your armpits become one giant rash.
So sure, spraying alcohol deodorant to prevent razor burn on your pits post-shave might sting, but it also kills off all that bacteria trying to leach into your pores. It means no razor burn, and we think that's worth celebrating. Here's how to stop razor burn with Pit Liquor:
A few tips:
Really feeling the burn? Try applying your Pit Liquor 5-10 minutes after your shower instead of right away. You'll still reap the rewards but lessen your sting.
Don't want to get too burned? Be sure to absolutely, positively, never spray down there. Trust us. It's a choice you don't want to make.
Razor burn still hitting a day later? Try reapplying 12-24 hours after you shave for a second time to keep your pits fresh and burn free.
Hey mama, did you pee alone today? Because I didn't. In fact, I haven't peed alone in over 8 years. That's right, eight years. I've spent the better part of the last decade without the regular decency afforded to most humans.
First it was the colicky baby that wouldn't let me put him down. I would slip him into his bouncer, frantically taking care of things before he screamed so loud it bothered the neighbors.
Then it was the sleepless baby, her sweet, bright eyes never willingly closing. I spent a full two years without a good night's rest. And bathroom breaks alone? Forget it. I took her with me so that the minute she was occupied I could fall asleep on the floor.
The third baby added a true circus routine to our lives. My littlest one firmly believed the only place to be happy was in my arms, and the ever-revolving door of diaper changes, feeding, naps, and playtime gave me no room to breathe.
Once we started potty training, the bathroom became a place to model what needed to be done. We'd celebrate moving from diapers to toilet, my toddlers cheering me on with just as much gusto as I did for them. Obviously, I also got jelly beans when things went well.
We're a few years down the road now, and this week we officially used our last diaper. My youngest is daytime potty trained, meaning we are down to a few pull-ups and, of course, regular trips to the bathroom together. I still get a rousing cheer when I use the bathroom, and I still rarely pee alone. But I see something new. I see a light at the end of the tunnel. My older kids don't need me in the bathroom anymore, and they are quickly needing less and less of my help in other areas too. This long season of littles has been hard and sweet and good. And now I'm excited for what lies ahead. I already love the conversations and board games and adventures I get to share with my big kids.
I see you, mama. I see you crying on the floor in the middle of the toys, wondering why this is so hard. I see you picking up cheerios off the floor and wishing for a hot meal. I see you at the end of the day, so tired you can barely make it upstairs before you curl up in bed. I see you pulling yourself out of bed night after night to rock the fussy baby or the frightened toddler, willingly sacrificing your sleep for your little one. I also see you laughing with your child, your heart opening wide with love for this little human. I see you pulling your child close, breathing in their baby smell, cherishing these sweet, quiet moments.
Your child sees you too. Those small eyes looking at you see past the spit-up on your t-shirt and the messy bun. They see you. They want to be with you always because you are their world. You are their moon and their stars and their galaxy. They cannot image a world that does not revolve directly around you. Their love for you runs as deep as the ocean and as wide as the sky.
Their small eyes look to you for affirmation, for encouragement, for love. They gauge their mood from your facial expressions. They model their likes and dislikes off your own. This might feel like an overwhelming responsibility sometimes, but really, it's a treasure. Someday these small humans will grow to much bigger humans who roll their eyes when you dance to "Baby Shark" and who think it's dumb that you like to dip apples in peanut butter. So when they insist on going potty with you (or eating out of your bowl or "borrowing" your sunglasses), it isn't to make you crazy. It's to be with the center of their world; to bask in the glory of mama.
Will you ever pee alone again? Probably. Chances are by the time that small human heads off to their first job, they won't be accompanying you to the bathroom anymore. But today when they scream "Good job, mommy!" after you pee? You are seen. You are loved. You are a super hero.
Melanie lives near Raleigh, NC with her husband and three kids. She loves hot coffee, good books, and deep conversations. Connect with her on Instagram via @intentional_motherhood
Some people claim that you have to detox your pits before a new natural deodorant really works. Is that true?